Trying Nearly Broke Me, But Just Being Is Healing Me

Shemeca Richard
Jan 21
4 min read

There comes a moment when the body and soul tell the truth before the mouth ever does. As I sit here with tears in my eyes, I realize something that feels both heavy and freeing: I have been trying my whole life.

Trying to fit in.

Trying to be seen.

Trying to feel important.

Trying to be a good worker.

Trying to be a good mother.

Trying to be a good wife.

Trying to be a good friend.

Just… trying.

And somewhere along the way, trying became my identity. Not thriving. Not resting. Not being. Just striving, constantly reaching for an invisible standard that always seemed to move the moment I got close.

The Exhaustion of Always Trying

Trying is exhausting. It keeps your shoulders tense and your heart guarded. It whispers that who you are, right now, is not quite enough. If you just do a little more, give a little more, perform a little better, then you will be worthy of love, affirmation, rest, or peace.

But the truth is this: trying without rest leads to burnout, resentment, and quiet grief. It creates a life where we are applauded for our strength but never seen in our softness. Where we are needed but not truly known.

Many of us learned early that being useful was safer than being authentic. That achievement earned affection. That silence kept the peace. So, we adapted. We performed. We tried.

What If I Just Be?

Lately, a holy question has been rising in my spirit:

What happens if I stop trying so hard… and just be?

What if I allow myself to be present instead of perfect?

What if I let myself be human instead of heroic?

What if I rest in who I am, not what I produce?

To just be feels almost rebellious in a world that rewards hustle and praises exhaustion. It feels uncomfortable when your worth has long been tied to your output. Yet, it also feels like exhaling after holding your breath for decades.

Being Is Not Laziness, It’s Healing

Let’s be clear: “just being” is not giving up. It’s not apathy. It’s not a lack of purpose. It is allowing yourself to exist without constantly proving your value.

Being means:

Being honest about your limits
Being present in the moment you’re in
Being gentle with your own heart
Being rooted instead of rushed

It’s choosing alignment over approval.

When we stop trying to earn what was never meant to be earned, such as love, dignity, worth, and value, we create space for healing. We stop living from a place of fear and start living from a place of truth.

God Never Asked You to “Try” Your Way Into Worthiness

Here is the sacred reminder many of us need: God never asked you to strive for your worth. You were already enough when He formed you. Already seen. Already chosen. Already loved.

Scripture reminds us:

Come to Me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Matthew 11:28

Be still and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth! Psalm 46:10

But he said to me, My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness.

Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. 2 Corinthians 12:9

These verses do not call us to try harder. They call us to come, to be still, and to rest in grace.

Grace does not require performance. Rest is not a reward, it’s an invitation.

When we “just be,” we are not stepping away from God; we are finally resting in Him.

An Invitation to Lay Down the Striving

If you are tired, deep in your soul tired, this is your permission and invitation to pause. To unclench your jaw. To lower your shoulders. To stop trying to be everything to everyone.

You don’t have to audition for belonging. You don’t have to earn rest. You don’t have to prove your value.

You can just be.

And in that being, you may finally discover that the peace you were trying to achieve has been waiting for you all along.

So today, I am learning, slowly and imperfectly, to trade striving for surrender.

To release the pressure. To breathe. To be.

And maybe that is where true endurance begins.

Closing Prayer

God, I am tired from trying. Tired of striving. Tired of carrying expectations that were never meant to be mine.

Today, I choose to lay them at Your feet. Teach me how to rest without guilt. Teach me how to be without performing. Help me trust that who I am in You is enough.

Quiet the voice that says I must earn love. Replace it with Your truth that I am already held, already known, already secure.

I surrender the pressure. I receive Your peace. I choose to just be.

Amen.

Reflection Questions